Thursday, November 16, 2006

Hugh Is That You?---NOT! duh...

On One Life To Live, it's been what about 6 weeks since a semi caused a fatality strewn multi-vehicle pile-up that claimed the life of beloved up and coming DA Hugh Hughes. However the residents of Llanview PA thought Hugh survived and another beloved citizen detective John Mcbain [portrayed by the delicious Michael Easton] was the one who bought the farm.

i've always liked Robert S. Woods, the actor who portrays police commissioner Bo Buchanan, but the character is one i've always thought couldn't find his ass with both hands. i hold him chiefly [no pun intended] responsible for why the good citizens of Llanview have been mourning the wrong guy all these weeks. The fans [those with an I.Q.higher than that of a potato anyway] of course were questioning why those in a position of authority were sooo quick to I.D. John as the corpse and Hugh as the survivor.

Both bodies were charred beyond recognition, and the ONLY evidence they use to confirm who's who [whom?] is a Saint Christopher medal clutched in one victim's hand. Uh, correct me if i'm wrong, but i'd estimate a few thousand people might be in possession of one of those talismans. But since McBain's fiance Natalie Buchanan, commissioner Buchanan's niece, recently gifted John with a Saint C medal, of course it had to be his medal and his hand. i can sympathize with McBain's brother, Doctor Michael McBain, thinking it was John [he's the one who I.D'd John's body]---he was overwhelmed with grief, and John's badge was a few feet from "the body". But for no other officials to say, oh i don't know something like 'doc mike, you're understandably upset, maybe you shouldn't be the one to make the final I.D. perhaps a DNA and/or blood sample is in order before we make any final declarations'.

But that didn't happen, and now poor Natalie is having a melt-down and is digging up what she has figured out is Hugh in John's grave. Tsk, tsk, tsk. And all because newest town ne'er do well Vincent Jones [portrayed by yummy Tobias Truvillion] has been visiting 'Hugh' in the hospital burn unit and discovered under his mummy-like bandages that the patient's eyes are blue. John's eyes are blue, Hugh's were brown.

Again, i could forgive that delayed revelation, except that not only are the color of their eyes different, they are different body types. To put it in athletic terms, Hugh was built more like a half-back, and John is built more like a wide receiver. So even though the patient in the burn unit is bandaged from head to toe, and only recently opened his eyes, how come no one, not even his parents---adoptive and biological [and his biological parents are doctors] noticed the difference in body types?!

Oh BTW, since it will probably be another 6 weeks until the "who are baby Tommy's biological parents?" storyline is concluded [Tommy was a foster kid recently adopted by Doc McBain and wife Marcie] remember where you heard it first kids: Todd Manning and crazy Margaret are Tommy's biological daddy and mommy.
Update as of Sunday 11~18~06: O K, just checked out Friday's [11~17~06] OLTL cliffhanger which confirmed my theory posted the day before the cliffhanger ep aired re: crazy Margaret and Todd being baby Tommy's biological parents. So i was wrong about it taking 6 weeks for that cat to be let out of the bag, but i was right about Tommy's gene pool.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Who Dat Baby's Daddy? or Is Doc Spencer Really A Buchanan or Not?

So, the paternity DNA results have been revealed, and they show that Asa Buchanan is not Spencer Truman's pa. Spencer theorizes the tests were tampered with, but Bo Buchanan quickly throws out that argument when he reminds Spencer that the tests were administered in the presence of attorneys for Asa, and Spencer, and the independent auditor of whom both parties approved. When reason doesn't persuade him, Spencer flips out, and proceeds to take Vikki hostage by putting her in a choke-hold. As a rule i am not an advocate of violence, but i have to admit i was enjoying seeing Vikki in this predicament---imho, she is just too sanctimonious and full of herself for words. Spencer's true baby bro' David Vickers calms him down and Vikki is released, and Spencer is cuffed, and returned to Llanview PD custody.

i had thought the paternity storyline was going run a little longer. The quick resolution was a bit anti-climactic. i also think it would have made for an interesting storyline for the tests to show Asa was Spencer's pa. Think of the fun that could have been had---access to the Buchanan billions for attorneys etc. in Spencer's murder trial. Pushing Clint, Bo, and Kevin's buttons. It could have been an arc that went on for weeks. Of course it's possible that despite the precautions, Asa did have the tests altered. As David pointed out, his mother had nothing to lose by her deathbed confession to Spencer that Asa was his pa, and she had no motive to lie, since at the time he was not a multi-billionaire. Time and plotlines will tell.